April 13, 2010
I would really just like to say that there is a perfectly legitimate reason for my lack of blogging this last – er, these last, two months…because I broke my leg and couldn’t exercise…but I can’t…because I didn’t break my leg. I broke something much, much worse! My willpower. It just snapped one day. I hit the snooze one morning and never looked back. Well, maybe I did. It appears the guilt never goes away completely, try as I did to make it. I did go on a hike or two, the first of which was a day or two after my last blog and truly did cause some non-exercisable pain. One form was physical – in the knee (for which I drew comfort in being excused from exercises for about a week); the other was in dignity, which I left no more than two miles from the start of the hike. I have to say, it left me in various bouts of comic relief for my fellow hikers (and myself) as I slipped and grappled with the mud/in the mud/through the mud…for hours…and hours…until we had to turn around due to snow and thunder, whereupon I repeated my self-inflicted mud-bashing. In fact, I brought so much mud back I wasn’t allowed to wear my clothes the same way I came in them for the ride home. Now, really, who doesn’t want a souvenir from a good trip?! Freaks…
So here I sit, finally not resembling a crack addict on her first day of sobriety – the shakes calmed quite a bit after my nice hot shower, although I think I could probably muster enough to simulate believable hypothermic shock symptoms. This is ridiculous. I’m going to eat some chocolate and go to bed.
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Oops
Feb. 9, 2010
My alarm clock looked me straight in the eye today, and I gave right in to the snooze button. It really didn’t take much convincing. Hopefully, this is not the beginning of the end. I have been doing so well!! Right now, it is 3 p.m. and I am home from work, effectively putting this exercise off a bit more by trying to catch up on my blog entries. Productive and important, I know.
********************************
I am an idiot. I just started my new week’s routine backwards. When the DVD was about halfway through, I realized it was a little too familiar for me to have watched it a whole week ago…which, it turns out, was completely true, since I had only just watched it on Saturday. But that’s not the worst part. I didn’t realize I actually did the wrong one until dinner, when I mentioned I did “Burn 3” today and Laura said, “Uhhh, you mean 1.”
Shoot! “Nope…Crap.”
Good thing I have tomorrow off again. Maybe my brain will relax this time, honestly recharge and get back on track on Thursday. Or maybe this is how my track is going to be. I love carnival rides!
My alarm clock looked me straight in the eye today, and I gave right in to the snooze button. It really didn’t take much convincing. Hopefully, this is not the beginning of the end. I have been doing so well!! Right now, it is 3 p.m. and I am home from work, effectively putting this exercise off a bit more by trying to catch up on my blog entries. Productive and important, I know.
********************************
I am an idiot. I just started my new week’s routine backwards. When the DVD was about halfway through, I realized it was a little too familiar for me to have watched it a whole week ago…which, it turns out, was completely true, since I had only just watched it on Saturday. But that’s not the worst part. I didn’t realize I actually did the wrong one until dinner, when I mentioned I did “Burn 3” today and Laura said, “Uhhh, you mean 1.”
Shoot! “Nope…Crap.”
Good thing I have tomorrow off again. Maybe my brain will relax this time, honestly recharge and get back on track on Thursday. Or maybe this is how my track is going to be. I love carnival rides!
Heaven
Feb. 8, 2010
Today, I slept in. And I didn’t have to pay for it later…nor did I have to pay for a delicious dinner at Olive Garden. (Thank you, Sarge!)
Ahh, bliss!
Maybe I did die on Friday after all…feels a little too much like Heaven…
Today, I slept in. And I didn’t have to pay for it later…nor did I have to pay for a delicious dinner at Olive Garden. (Thank you, Sarge!)
Ahh, bliss!
Maybe I did die on Friday after all…feels a little too much like Heaven…
Burnt out
Feb. 7, 2010
“Burn Off/Recharge” is a very mean misnomer. Here I was expecting to get a break from the other Burn days, but noooooo…that’s not what “Burn Off” means. “Burn Off” means burn off every single calorie you anticipate to eat today…and the rest of the week! Apparently, it’s the cardio workout. And apparently, my poor heart needs to pump like a broken water spigot. At 6:30 in the morning.
As for the “Recharge”? Forget it. Tomorrow, when I find myself unable to swing my legs over the edge of the bed, is what that is for.
“Burn Off/Recharge” is a very mean misnomer. Here I was expecting to get a break from the other Burn days, but noooooo…that’s not what “Burn Off” means. “Burn Off” means burn off every single calorie you anticipate to eat today…and the rest of the week! Apparently, it’s the cardio workout. And apparently, my poor heart needs to pump like a broken water spigot. At 6:30 in the morning.
As for the “Recharge”? Forget it. Tomorrow, when I find myself unable to swing my legs over the edge of the bed, is what that is for.
Procrastination - 1, Me - 0
Feb. 6, 2010
Well, the organizer in me was really stoked about getting caught up on this blog…but the procrastinator in me just couldn’t keep it up. I immediately suffered intense writer’s block, which lasted at least three days... (I still don’t actually know whether my mind has been unblocked, but I’m going to go for it anyway - we'll see when this finally gets posted, I guess).
So, Saturday – er, today, was the last of the Burn sequences, “Burn 3.” Plus, I had the ab workout that I conveniently forgot to do yesterday. It wasn’t so bad. I mean, I was expecting the abs to be so much worse since I don’t really have any, but there were only a few exercises that were completely beyond my pitiful attempts.
Yay for "Recharge" tomorrow!
Well, the organizer in me was really stoked about getting caught up on this blog…but the procrastinator in me just couldn’t keep it up. I immediately suffered intense writer’s block, which lasted at least three days... (I still don’t actually know whether my mind has been unblocked, but I’m going to go for it anyway - we'll see when this finally gets posted, I guess).
So, Saturday – er, today, was the last of the Burn sequences, “Burn 3.” Plus, I had the ab workout that I conveniently forgot to do yesterday. It wasn’t so bad. I mean, I was expecting the abs to be so much worse since I don’t really have any, but there were only a few exercises that were completely beyond my pitiful attempts.
Yay for "Recharge" tomorrow!
Friday, February 5, 2010
Good news, bad news
February 5, 2010
Good news: I’m alive. Yay! Half-bad news: I wouldn't haven't had any flowers at my service. It's cool, I didn't really want flowers, anyway. Real bad news: I accidentally skipped part of the killer workout.
Yeah, I know what you’re thinking – Accidentally, huh? Suuuuure. It’s true, though, I swear! The video I watched was already like, 45 minutes long! I thought surely, that was enough to endure for one morning. I didn’t figure out until later, while rehashing my morning in embarrassing detail to my new life coach, that I was supposed to have watched (and followed) two videos this morning. Whoops!! (Normally, I would feel bad about this under, well, honestly, no circumstances).
I suppose this means it’s tacked onto some other excruciating routine, now. Today’s was cardio. You think cardio, you think, Ooh! A nice break! I can do that! Yeah, no. Maybe it was just me that thought that… I put the DVD in and Chalean announced it was Cardio Day, and the relief that spread through me was indescribable. It was just a joke! I thought. Score! Yeah, score for team Lean Machine. That crap was hard! Yesterday my legs shook. Today, my arms nearly fell right off. Although, to be fair, my legs were already sore from the last two days, so I can’t really tell whether they hurt from today or not.
I can’t wait to wake up tomorrow and see what else I can’t move. Anyone wanna place bets? I’ve got $3 on my triceps. And biceps.
Good news: I’m alive. Yay! Half-bad news: I wouldn't haven't had any flowers at my service. It's cool, I didn't really want flowers, anyway. Real bad news: I accidentally skipped part of the killer workout.
Yeah, I know what you’re thinking – Accidentally, huh? Suuuuure. It’s true, though, I swear! The video I watched was already like, 45 minutes long! I thought surely, that was enough to endure for one morning. I didn’t figure out until later, while rehashing my morning in embarrassing detail to my new life coach, that I was supposed to have watched (and followed) two videos this morning. Whoops!! (Normally, I would feel bad about this under, well, honestly, no circumstances).
I suppose this means it’s tacked onto some other excruciating routine, now. Today’s was cardio. You think cardio, you think, Ooh! A nice break! I can do that! Yeah, no. Maybe it was just me that thought that… I put the DVD in and Chalean announced it was Cardio Day, and the relief that spread through me was indescribable. It was just a joke! I thought. Score! Yeah, score for team Lean Machine. That crap was hard! Yesterday my legs shook. Today, my arms nearly fell right off. Although, to be fair, my legs were already sore from the last two days, so I can’t really tell whether they hurt from today or not.
I can’t wait to wake up tomorrow and see what else I can’t move. Anyone wanna place bets? I’ve got $3 on my triceps. And biceps.
So long!
Feb. 4, 2010
Chalean says I’m worth it. She says I deserve this hour. My God, what have I done?? If I’m going to die tomorrow, then so be it. I don’t think I can walk without looking like Parkinson’s patient. I’m serious. I was so shaky this morning, it’s a miracle I could put on eyeliner.
Today was “Burn 2.” Why this was so much more difficult than “Burn 1,” I have no idea. I’m inclined to blame the extra push-ups. I’m really curious about tomorrow’s “insane” workout… I mean, not curious enough to look ahead of time… I know better than that. I would snooze myself until Sunday, if not sometime in July, to avoid it, probably.
And speaking of snooze, I really should have opted for one this afternoon instead of visiting that still sadly mistakenly self-important sister of mine, but I was really excited to tell her I had vegetables for lunch. And some congratulations I got.
“Guess what?! I had broccoli for lunch! Aren’t you proud?”
“Yes. What else did you have?”
“Just tri-tip and broccoli casserole.” I grinned, pleased with myself.
“Hold on…you had Mom’s broccoli casserole?”
“Yep! There’s some left – you want it?”
“Ummmm, do you have any idea how much FAT is in that?”
“It’s bro-cco-li casserole…” I said it real slow so she could understand what I was trying to tell her.
“Yeah, and there’s a half a CUP of mayonnaise in it! And cheddar cheeeeese. Aaaaaand cream of chicken soup!”
“I didn’t eat a half a cup of mayonnaise.”
“Let’s look it up.”
“Let’s not.”
And so went our conversation until I was forced to sit there and wait like a little kid on time-out for her to finish rattling off (and looking up) all the bad things about my vegetable- and protein-rich lunch.
“What are you having for dinner?” she continued.
“I’m meeting a friend.”
“Where are you going?”
I paused, unsure of whether to tell her the truth or not. I went for it.
“Bertha Miranda’s. That’s allowed.”
She dropped it. Aha! I win. Miraculously, she didn’t recall the place. (It’s pretty much the best Mexican food in town and I was dead-set on a chimichanga, whatever she might say).
Half an hour later she asks, “Where is this Bethesda Matilda’s?”
I laughed for ten minutes. Then, regrettably, I told her. The ethnicity of the food also came about…
“Oh that’s fiiiiine,” she assured me.
I smiled. But it faltered as the look on her face transformed.
“You’re gonna die tomorrow anyway! Happy eating!”
I let a small groan escape.
“You better post all your blogs when you get home,” Laura added. “You say goodbye to your friends tonight!!”
O.K., well…so long!
Chalean says I’m worth it. She says I deserve this hour. My God, what have I done?? If I’m going to die tomorrow, then so be it. I don’t think I can walk without looking like Parkinson’s patient. I’m serious. I was so shaky this morning, it’s a miracle I could put on eyeliner.
Today was “Burn 2.” Why this was so much more difficult than “Burn 1,” I have no idea. I’m inclined to blame the extra push-ups. I’m really curious about tomorrow’s “insane” workout… I mean, not curious enough to look ahead of time… I know better than that. I would snooze myself until Sunday, if not sometime in July, to avoid it, probably.
And speaking of snooze, I really should have opted for one this afternoon instead of visiting that still sadly mistakenly self-important sister of mine, but I was really excited to tell her I had vegetables for lunch. And some congratulations I got.
“Guess what?! I had broccoli for lunch! Aren’t you proud?”
“Yes. What else did you have?”
“Just tri-tip and broccoli casserole.” I grinned, pleased with myself.
“Hold on…you had Mom’s broccoli casserole?”
“Yep! There’s some left – you want it?”
“Ummmm, do you have any idea how much FAT is in that?”
“It’s bro-cco-li casserole…” I said it real slow so she could understand what I was trying to tell her.
“Yeah, and there’s a half a CUP of mayonnaise in it! And cheddar cheeeeese. Aaaaaand cream of chicken soup!”
“I didn’t eat a half a cup of mayonnaise.”
“Let’s look it up.”
“Let’s not.”
And so went our conversation until I was forced to sit there and wait like a little kid on time-out for her to finish rattling off (and looking up) all the bad things about my vegetable- and protein-rich lunch.
“What are you having for dinner?” she continued.
“I’m meeting a friend.”
“Where are you going?”
I paused, unsure of whether to tell her the truth or not. I went for it.
“Bertha Miranda’s. That’s allowed.”
She dropped it. Aha! I win. Miraculously, she didn’t recall the place. (It’s pretty much the best Mexican food in town and I was dead-set on a chimichanga, whatever she might say).
Half an hour later she asks, “Where is this Bethesda Matilda’s?”
I laughed for ten minutes. Then, regrettably, I told her. The ethnicity of the food also came about…
“Oh that’s fiiiiine,” she assured me.
I smiled. But it faltered as the look on her face transformed.
“You’re gonna die tomorrow anyway! Happy eating!”
I let a small groan escape.
“You better post all your blogs when you get home,” Laura added. “You say goodbye to your friends tonight!!”
O.K., well…so long!
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